We often advise parents not to worry so much about the label but to focus on proactive steps they can take to help their son. To raise a successful son with ADHD, you must start doing things differently from the day you find out your son has ADHD.
Recognize That ADHD Is a Disability
Even though your son may look fine on the outside, his mind is wired very differently. Taking a “disability perspective” provides understanding. You are taking a great step by reading this book and teaching yourself more about ADHD. Increasing your knowledge about ADHD is key to raising a successful son.
Try to Become More Understanding and Patient
That doesn’t mean you will let your son “get away with things,” but you will need to learn to respond differently. When Jim gets upset or frustrated with his son, he tends to point his index finger at Teddy and shake it up and down as he scolds him. Jim became so frustrated at himself that he was determined to stop this automatic response. One day he decided to write the letters “u” and “p” on the edge of his finger. When he got upset and pointed his finger at Teddy, Jim got an automatic visual reminder to have understanding and patience. This simple strategy worked!
Locate Support Personnel
Begin to locate different support personnel such as educators, counselors, and doctors who can serve as resources throughout the years. Part of raising a successful son with ADHD is recognizing that it’s very tough to try to do alone. If your son is going to be successful, at the very minimum you must have his teachers’ support.
Prepare for the Long Haul
Realize that you and your son are going to have really good periods and really rough patches and that meaningful change will occur over time. Remember that maturation helps most boys with ADHD, and as they move from the preschool to upper elementary years, the tantrums and tears tend to decrease.
Source : James W. Forgan, Ph.D., and Mary Anne Richey. Raising Boys with ADHD. Prufrock Press Inc. 2012
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