Toddlerhood series : How can I help my child behave?

• Keep your toddler busy. Keeping your toddler busy may sound like an absurd suggestion, since toddlers are seldom still for a moment. But by providing constructive outlets for his energy, you can

encourage your toddler to behave well. When he seems fussy or cranky, he may settle down if you offer him a distraction or make him laugh. He enjoys many kinds of toys—pull toys, play clay, big

cardboard blocks, simple wooden puzzles, cars and trucks, riding toys, toy telephones, and computers. He also likes lots of things you might not think of as toys—a wooden spoon to bang on a

pot, or a stack of plastic containers to build with. Don’t forget the great outdoors, either. You can set up wonderful pastimes outside (some of them indoors, too, with proper precautions). Give him a shallow pan of water and some kitchen utensils—a plastic measuring cup, a set of measuring spoons, a plastic turkey baster, and a sieve, and he’ll be happy for a surprisingly long time. Give him a spoon to dig in the dirt with, and a bucket to fill and empty. Go for walks, and talk to him about the things you see—trees, buses, dogs, other children. Visit playgrounds that offer a variety of climbing equipment. The busier you can keep him with acceptable activities, the less time he’ll have for things that are dangerous or destructive.

• Set limits on what he’s allowed to do. It can be hard for parents to set limits for active children. You want your child to love you. But your job isn’t to be your child’s favorite person all the time. It’s to

keep your toddler safe from harm and help him grow in appropriate ways, even when he might prefer to have all the freedoms of his big brother. Your child needs you to ask him to do some things he won’t like, and keep him from doing others that he would like. He needs you to set a consistent bedtime for him, to keep him from hitting other children, and to let him know he can’t fill up on candy every day just before dinner. He may react angrily when you put limits like these on his behavior, and that’s natural. It’s probably a sign that you’re doing you’re job as a parent if he occasionally stomps away or yells, “I hate you!”

• Remove unnecessary temptations. Keeping your child away from temptations might seem to be an impossibility. After all, your toddler is at an age when everything seems to tempt him—the fragile vase on a living-room shelf, the hot cup of coffee on the breakfast table, the scissors you’re using to clip a few coupons. But you and your toddler will have fewer struggles if you can remove (or take other steps to protect him from) the items that could harm him or that you don’t want destroyed. Right now you never know what he’ll want to get into, so the best approach is to simply keep him away from anything you don’t want him to touch, swallow, or use as a plaything.

Source : Questions Parents Of Toddler Ask. Ceridian Corporation.2001

Toddlerhood series : Why does my toddler act the way she does?

As your toddler begins to explore the world, he needs you to set firm but gentle limits on what he can and can’t do. You don’t want to stifle the curiosity and spirit of adventure that makes life so exciting for your toddler now. But you do want to keep him safe, and you want to teach him how to behave.

At this stage, your child is becoming her own person, separate from you. She wants to explore the things that interest her, which won’t always be the same as the things that you want her to explore. You’ll have fewer struggles over her behavior if you build some flexibility into your approach. If you want to look at the flowers with your toddler—but find out that she wants to make mud pies instead—she isn’t trying to be difficult. She’s just following her natural curiosity about the world.

It’s helpful to keep in mind that children don’t really begin to develop self-control until about age 3. Until then, your toddler has few internal “no’s” to stop her from doing what she wants even if she does know it’s something you don’t approve of. You have to help your toddler control her impulses because she can’t do it by herself.

Depending on her maturity, your toddler may be able to control certain things about her behavior, such as whether or not she kicks a playmate or pulls the cat’s tail. But she can’t control her feelings. She can’t help whether she feels happy or sad, or angry or calm. And she can’t control whether she wants to pull soup cans off the supermarket shelf even though you’ve asked her not to. So she usually isn’t trying to disobey when she has a tantrum or makes a mess. Instead, she’s saying, “Help! I don’t know what else to do right now.” She’s telling you that she needs you to help her keep from reaching her boiling point or find appropriate ways to express her feelings if she does.

Remember that your toddler doesn’t really want her own way all the time, even if it sometimes seems that way. She wants some control, but having it all would be scary. When she pushes, she’s trying to find out what is OK and what isn’t.

So your job is to decide what’s acceptable to you and what isn’t. It’s essential not to compromise on safety issues, such as using a car safety seat or requiring your child to hold your hand while crossing streets. But on some issues there may be no clear-cut line between what’s “best” and what’s not. You may have very different ideas from a close co-worker about what kind of snacks or toys your toddlers should have, and each of you can be making the right decision for your child.

Source : Questions Parents Of Toddler Ask. Ceridian Corporation.2001

Toddlerhood series : What are these years like for you?

These two short years are probably the most exhausting years of parenthood, but they can also be some of the most exhilarating. Sometimes you may think that you spend all your time trying to protect your toddler from harm and trying to save your home from total destruction. It’s natural to feel frustrated and exasperated a lot, especially if you have another job outside the home.

You might look forward all week to spending time with your toddler at the park on Saturday, showing him the ducklings you know he’ll love. When the weekend arrives, you find that he wants to go to the park, too, but he wails when you try to put on his jacket. When you come home, he doesn’t want to get into the bath, and then he doesn’t want to get out. He throws his food on the floor, then cries because it’s gone. Conflict may take up much of your life with him. On the other hand, your toddler can be enchanting. You may come home from work after a tough day and find that your concerns melt away when he crawls into your lap. He’s so full of wonder and excitement that some of it rubs off on you and you see the world through his fresh eyes. The sun and moon look bigger and flowers seem to pop up when he walks by. Watching him grow in skill and understanding brings delight and triumph every day.

These years may be easier if you

• Expect the unexpected

• Remember that every child develops at his own pace

• Take advantage of community resources

• Get together on your lunch hour with co-workers who have toddlers

• Accept that your child’s favorite word may be, “NO!”

• Visit Internet Web sites for parents of toddlers

Source : Questions Parents Of Toddler Ask. Ceridian Corporation.2001

Are there any food safety issues related to pregnancy?

Pregnant women are especially susceptible to foodborne and waterborne hazards due to the physiological changes in pregnancy that may increase the exposure of the mother and fetus to hazardous substances.

To reduce the risk for foodborne illnesses, pregnant women need to follow general food safety guidelines: wash hands and surfaces often, don’t cross-contaminate, refrigerate perishable foods promptly, and cook food to proper temperatures.

Foodborne illness can be very harmful. For example, listeriosis can cause miscarriage, stillbirth, or acute illness, and toxoplasmosis and E. coli can cause severe fetal infection. Pregnant women should avoid raw fish and seafood, and any fish that may be contaminated with methyl mercury and PCBs. The FDA recommends that pregnant women avoid swordfish, shark, king mackerel and tilefish. Nutrition counseling during pregnancy should address these food safety issues.

Source : Healthy Eating During Pregnancy. International Food Information Council Foundation. 2003

Can morning sickness and other forms of GI distress be relieved?

Although some expectant mothers never experience it, morning sickness is common and does not necessarily occur only in the morning. Feelings of nausea may be relieved by eating low-fat, easily digested carbohydrate foods, such as dry toast, plain crackers, cereal, pasta, rice, or fruit.

For nausea and vomiting, small, frequent meals tend to be tolerated better than large ones. Fried, gas-forming, or spicy foods may cause discomfort. Fluids often are better tolerated between meals rather than with them. A snack before getting up or bedtime may help. If the problem persists or becomes severe, the woman should seek advice from her health professional. Constipation also can be a problem and may partially result from decreased intestinal motility, characteristic of the second and third trimesters. Foods high in insoluble fiber, such as fresh fruits and vegetables and whole grain breads and cereal, can help alleviate constipation. Liberal consumption of fluids and a regular pattern of moderate physical activity also can help. Iron supplements may promote constipation, especially if fiber intake is low; check the dosage. Unless advised by a health care provider, laxatives are best avoided.

Source : Healthy Eating During Pregnancy. International Food Information Council Foundation. 2003